For many of us, spending time with family during the holidays is a joyous occasion. But for others, the holidays with family can be quite difficult.
From the stress of traveling to buying and wrapping presents and the fact many family members can’t be in the same room with each other without a fight erupting makes the holidays stressful!
While you can’t necessarily stop family drama from occurring, there are some simple and effective ways you can deal with it:
Have Realistic Expectations
So much of the pain of the holidays comes from having unrealistic expectations. Don’t set yourself up for disappointment.
Acknowledge beforehand that you and your family are human and that there may be those moments that aren’t very pleasant and that’s okay. Life and families are messy. Recognize it, own it and you’ll find you won’t get as upset.
Set Your Boundaries
Time spent with families over the holidays can also trigger us to feel helpless or powerless. But you are an adult now and you can set boundaries to protect your mental health.
Decide what you will tolerate and what you won’t. This can be for simple things like meal times and sleeping accommodations to what topics of discussion you will engage in.
Be sure to communicate your personal limits with all involved but do so in a calm and nonjudgmental manner. To learn more about setting and communicating your boundaries in relationships check out the link below.
Practice Self-Care
Take time to care for yourself. Practice coping tools, such as praying, deep breathing or mindfulness meditation, to help you feel less stressed and at peace. Consider taking a warm bath, get a massage, or take a yoga class. In addition, rely upon your support system for additional support.
Use Good Judgement
When the holiday drama sets in, it’s easy to want to drink more or eat more processed foods. But in large amounts, alcohol and processed sugars impair our mood and judgement. Do your best to not overindulge.
You may also want to speak with a therapist in the weeks leading up to the holidays. I can give you tools to help you navigate the awkward and tense moments during family get-togethers.
If you’re interested in exploring counseling, please reach out to me. I’d love to help your holidays be warm and merry (or at least tolerable!).
SOURCES:
https://brainmd.com/blog/how-to-avoid-family-drama-during-the-holidays/
https://www.care.com/c/toxic-family-during-the-holidays/